Assertiveness in communication

 

Assertiveness in communication

 

Assertiveness in communication, especially at work, makes us feel better about ourselves and our colleagues.  This skill contributes to more satisfying relationships. Assertiveness is also important in managing stress resulting from work overload and interpersonal conflicts. And it helps promote self-confidence.

Assertiveness is a communicative style that implies an attitude of self-affirmation and defence of our rights, while also respecting the rights of others. It implies expressing our opinions, feelings and needs appropriately.

 

Ø Why is assertiveness necessary?

What does the opinion that bosses and colleagues have of a worker depend on? Do you think that the one who knows the most is valued more? Or can you know a lot and be undervalued? The valuation they make of you as a worker is not based exclusively on your knowledge. This will be an important requirement, but it does not guarantee your success in the company. If you know a lot, but don't have the right attitude this will hinder your chances of growth.

Social skills such as assertiveness in communication are a component that multiplies your chances of being valued and succeeding in your career.

Assertive people have higher self-esteem and are better valued by others. They are also more likely to achieve their goals. Others see them as confident, honest and respectful. They are seen as reasonable people with whom you can talk things over and disagree without conflict.

Assertiveness makes it easier for others to understand our needs. It encourages good management of disagreements and conflict prevention.

 

Some examples of assertiveness in communication at work:

- Giving our opinion about something and daring to disagree. This will make us feel good and give us value in the team. We must feel that we are contributing something and make our opinion count.

- Make constructive criticism. If there is something that we don't like, that affects us and is important, we must express it in the right way. The aim is for the other person to understand the criticism and reach an agreement. On the other hand, we must avoid being too picky. We must be tolerant and flexible.

- Reject requests. Knowing how to say it is not important to be effective and manage the stress produced by overwork.

- Accessing the requests of our colleagues, in general, is positive so that they see us as a collaborative person. However, sometimes we will be forced to say no. It is important to be able to refuse requests if they conflict with objectives and priorities. Sometimes we can't do anything.

- To be able to say that it is not honest and liberating. And it helps to significantly reduce our stress levels.

  

Ø How to be assertive?

In theory, we can all understand the concept of assertiveness in communication. The question is how to put it into practice.

Here are some tips on how to be assertive and put it into practice:

·         Take care of your non-verbal communication. Your look, your posture, your gestures, the volume and tone of your voice transmit much more than the content of your message.

·         Avoid conveying aggression or insecurity with your non-verbal communication.

·         Choose an appropriate time and place to talk, especially if it is about topics that need to be discussed in private.

·         Take into account the hierarchical level and the relationship you have with that person and adapt your speech so that it is appropriate.

·         Avoid using an imposed whole and words like "should" or "must".

·         The content of what you say should have two important parts:

- On the one hand, it is good to start by putting yourself in the other person's shoes to show empathy and respect for their point of view. This will predispose the other person to listen to you more willingly and be less defensive.

- Then express your opinion, feeling or request briefly and clearly. For example: "I understand that you need this task and that you are in a hurry. I'd love to help you, but I won't be able to do so until I finish this.